THE
TEXAS
CHAINSAW
MASSACRE
With
Jessica
Biel,
Jonathan
Tucker,
Erica
Leerhsen,
R.
Lee
Ermey,
Andrew
Bryniarski,
Eric
Balfour
Directed
by
Marcus
Nispel
At
the
sight
of
this
remake's
trailer
I
punctuated
it
with
a
loud
raspberry.
The
though
tof
anyone
having
the
audacity
to
attempt
remaking
such
a
classic
film
of
unparalleled
terror
was
insulting
to
me.
But,
in
its
defence
after
watching
the
film,
this
reappraisal
of
the
classic
early
'70s
Tobe
Hooper
horror
comes
out
the
other
side
in
tact.
The
writers
took
the
basic
idea
of
a
group
of
youngsters
crossing
through
backwoods
Texas
and
falling
prey
to
a
family
of
freaks
and
inserted
their
own
themes,
deleting
specific
characters
and
added
some
others.
Thankfully
key
maniac
Leatherface
(the
chainsaw-wielding
son
and
head
butcher
of
the
screwed
up
family)
is
untouched.
Fortunately
the
same
year
(1974)
was
also
kept
and
not
updated
to
a
modern
time
of
annoying
American
brats
ala
Scream.
A
kid
and
abducted
baby
is
added,
the
wheelchair
shifts
from
the
van
of
teens
to
the
old
man
in
the
house,
the
female
meat
hook
victim
becomes
a
guy,
the
freaky
hitch-hiker
also
gets
a
gender
switch
with
suicidal
tendencies
etc.
The
dark
design
with
its
hot,
musty
&
grimy
locations
is
effectively
conveyed
via
original
cinematographer
Daniel
Pearl's
eerie
approach,
removing
the
film
from
modern
glossy
slasher
crap.
The
menacing
nature
of
the
story
also
get
little
touches
added
to
make
the
viewer
care
a
bit
more
for
the
characters
as
opposed
to
fresh
meat
for
the
killer
over
whom
no
tear
will
be
shed.
While
some
rabid
TCM
fans
(not
Turner
Classic
Movies)
will
be
outraged
at
the
gall
to
remake
a
classic
such
as
this,
I
must
admit
I
shared
that
view
until
a
third
into
the
film
-
yet
it
turned
out
to
be
a
satisfyingly
gruesome,
shocking,
creepy
experience
which
would've
been
even
better
had
it
not
been
based
on
the
landmark
original
(which
was
in
part
inspired
by
the
Ed
Gein
serial
killings),
that
fact
impossible
to
ignore.
Biel
is
pretty
damn
hot
and
Ermey
sadistically
brilliant.
And
as
my
tense
tendons
relaxed
remake
of
another
classic
swung
around
-
George
A.
Romero's
Dawn
Of
The
Dead.
Why
don't
they
just
remake
E.T.
while
they're
at
it!
4
/
B
-
PB
1
2
3
4
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6
A
-
B
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C
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